I am back in my hometown of Kuala Lumpur, after spending one night en route with my friends Shoe Lady and Investment Banker Friend in Singapore. This gave us an opportunity to have a meal together and to share family news.
The principal reason for this trip, as in all the trips for the past two years, is to lend a helping hand in the family home. This time my trip started with a different type of family reunion. My mother is one of 11 siblings and happily seven are still with us, with Kepong Auntie now being the oldest sister at 96 years of age. The oldest brother is Toronto Uncle who celebrated his 94th birthday last Friday. According to the Chinese calendar, he is now 95 years of age. You can work out your Chinese birthday date here.
They say it takes a village to raise a child, but our family may have gotten it wrong (or Wong as the case might be). Turning everything on its head, it took just one grandmother to raise a whole village.
And what a global village this has turned out to be. I am one of 31 cousins scattered across Malaysia, Australia, America, Canada and England. On a rough head count there are around 50 members in the next generation.
A special birthday calls for a special party. I am full of admiration for Toronto Uncle who decided to throw his party here in KL and to invite us, the villagers: his Canadian children and grandchildren, and the relatives in Malaysia. In the lead up to this date Cousin A had to do a lot of thinking and planning. She is the right person to have been tasked with this big job.
As I mentioned before, Cousin A is called Cousin A because she gives her best in everything she does. As usual she pulled out all the stops and delivered a 5-table party for 50 people at one of the extended family’s houses. It was a truly exceptional and memorable evening, bringing to mind the big family parties my grandmother used to host when my cousins and I were still at school.
We often hear the phrase go big or go home. Take a leaf out of Cousin A’s book: you can go home and go big at the same time. The catering on the home front included a whole spit-roast lamb, plates of Hong Kong-style roasted goose, our beloved Malaysian satay, nasi lemak and laksa. There were not one but four cakes: two cream-filled sponge cakes, a jelly cake and a long-life bao cake where the big bao opens up to reveal little baos. The latter was from Cousin’s A children as it was also her birthday the next day.
As with all posts on this blog, I have intentionally not featured photos of people I know. An exception is Kepong Auntie and the giant croissant. The morning after the party the night before, our extended family gathered at Blackbixon. This time we planned ahead and ordered our own Croissant XXL. Two in fact. When you need to feed a village, less is not more. Less is not what Chinese families aspire to and more is well, just more fun. Here then is the second exception to the rule of not featuring current photos of people: Toronto Uncle with the giant croissant.
Thanks to Cousin A we had two further gatherings. On Saturday we had a free-style hawker dinner in Malaysia Food Village by Yong Kee, located in the basement of the Four Seasons Hotel. This delighted everyone young and old because everyone chose one or two dishes to share.
On Sunday our group took up three tables at Restoran 9888 Fatt Kee (the Chinese name is 发记海鲜楼 Fatt Kee Seafood Restaurant). The restaurant was packed with families having a Sunday night outing. The party started off well with the teacups coming in a plastic bowl. Pouring boiling hot water over the cups is not a post-covid precaution. This was always the way my grandmother sterilised the teacups and chopsticks before using them.
The thing we like about gathering around communal tables Chinese style: you can stuff your face silly or you can hold back if for any reason you happen not to be that hungry. One size really does fit all in this sense. The dishes were served family style, in the middle of a round table. Most of the dishes would not pass the healthy heart test but as Cardio Cousin said: it’s good for my business!
As part of this trip, Toronto Uncle took his family to see my grandmother’s shophouse. The ground floor used to house the furniture rental business, and a tailor / seamstress used to occupy the upper floor. My cousins and I have grown big, and the shophouse has grown small. We cannot now imagine how around 60 of us (my rough guess) could fit into the space every Chinese New Year, but we did.
When my grandmother passed away in August 1984, the business continued for awhile under the care of one of my uncles. Eventually the decision was taken to convert the property to a rental space on the ground floor and a living/ family space on the first floor. For years the extended family still gathered here every Chinese New Year. Now my uncles and aunties are all getting on in age, that generation meets less frequently. But hey! We have now enthused the next and next, next generations to carry the torch and light the way to another few hundred parties. Remember, there is no right way, only the Wong way: I am ready to be invited to the next big gathering wherever that may be.
Addresses
Blackbixon Cafe and Restaurant: 17 Jalan Inai, Off Jalan Imbi, 55100 Kuala Lumpur
Malaysia Food Village by Yong Kee: Level B, The Shoppes at Four Seasons Place, 145 Jalan Ampang, 50450 Kuala Lumpur
Restoran 9888 Fatt Kee: 111 – 115 Jalan Cerapu Cheras, 56100 Kuala Lumpur